A Cheater’s Ignorance
CAST CHARACTERS
Jocelin Romero Joshua
Yashica Halton Mari
Juanita Soto Kim
(Joshua is arriving home from work)
MARI: Joshua is that you?
JOSHUA: Yeah honey what is it?
MARI: I heard something very interesting today. (ATTITUDE)
JOSHUA: RRRReally? And what wwould that be> (GETTING A BIT PARANOID)
MARI: I heard someone down in your office is being unfaithful to their wife!
JOSHUA: What?! No way, who on Earth could that be? (JOSHUA IS HESITANT)
MARI: I think you know EXACTLY who it is I’m talking about! (ANGRY ACCUSATION)
JOSHUA: Oh…oh you don’t think that I’M the one who is being unfaithful now do you?
MARI: Yes! As a matter of fact I do!
JOSHUA: Now why on Earth would you think that?!
MARI: Why Joshua, why did you do it?! (DISSAPOINTED)
JOSHUA: I told you I didn’t!
MARI: Then explain these photographs!—And these undergarments I found in your pants when I was doing laundry! (ANGRY)
JOSHUA: Those pictures are fake! And that underwear is yours!
MARI: Oh yeah of course they are mine…because I’m a size double zero right?!
(JOSHUA’S PHONE RINGS—KIM CALLING)
(JOSHUA TURNS OFF THE PHONE)
MARI: Who was that? (PRETEDNING AS IF TO NOT KNOW IT WAS HIS MISTRESS)
JOSHUA: No one.
MARI: Sure it wasn’t.
(JOSHUA’S PHONE RINGS AGAIN)
MARI: Answer it Joshua! Go right ahead, do it! (ANGRILY)
JOSHUA: Really? (THINKING MARI IS SERIOUS)
MARI: NO NOT REALLY! Are you really that ignorant?!
JOSHUA: Ignorant is what ignorant does!
(DOOR BELL RINGS AND THEY BOTH TURN TOWARD THE DOOR)
MARI: I’ll get it… (FRUSTRATED THAT SOMEONE IS INTERRUPTING)
(MARI ANSWER THE DOOR—KIM IS AT THE DOOR)
MARI: Who are you?
KIM: I’m sorry I must have the wrong address, I was looking for Joshua…Joshua Beat…? (CONFUSED ABOUT WHO MARI IS)
MARI: Who’s asking?
KIM: I’m Kim…Joshua’s girlfriend…
(JOSHUA COMES IN AND SEES KIM AT THE DOOR…BECOMES HESITANT…MARI GIVES JOSHUA AN EVIL LOOK…KIM SEES JOSHUA)
KIM: Joshy?...What’s going on?
MARI: Yeah JOSHY…what’s going on? (SARCASTICALLY)
JOSHUA: (SCARED OUT OF HIS MIND) M-M-M-M-Mari I can explain…
KIM: Joshy…who is this?
JOSHUA: Kim… this is my…
MARI: (TO JOSHUA) and exactly how do you know her name?!
KIM: I told you I’m his girlfriend…who are you?
MARI: I’m this bastard’s wife!
KIM: WHAT?!—oh you must be mistaken…Joshy what is she talking about?!
JOSHUA: Kim…this is my wife…Mari. (GIVING UP)
KIM: WHAT?! (IN SHOCK)
MARI: Exactly what you hear! This good-for-nothing-so-called “MAN” has been cheating on me with you!
KIM: I don’t believe you!-You’re lying!- Joshy please tell me she’s lying!-Please tell me this isn’t true!
MARI: Yeah JOSHY, tell her this isn’t true, go on tell her!
(JOSHUA STAYS SILENT)
MARI: That’s right you can’t can you?!
(KIM LOOKS VERY DISSAPOINTED AND HEART BROKEN BUT ALSO ANGRY)
JOSHUA: Kim I can explain…
MARI: I would LOVE to hear this!
(JOSHUA PAUSES)
KIM: (TO JOSHUA) Well…?
JOSHUA: See that had happened was…ummm… (HESITATES)
MARI: We’re waiting!
JOSHUA: See that’s what I don’t like, you’re constantly nagging and…
MARI: Oh don’t try to turn this around on me!
KIM: Uhhh…hello did we forget that there’s a third party involved?
MARI: Now how could I ever forget about that immature little twerp that stole my husband from me?! (SARCASTIC)
KIM: Little twerp?! Well, grandma, maybe he was tired of seeing your old wrinkly face nagging his ear off… and that’s why he went off and found himself a real woman!
(MARI AND KIM ARE ABOUT TO ENGAGE AND JOSHUA PULLS THEM APART)
JOSHUA: Ladies…ladies…no need to fight over me. (COCKY)
KIM: Wait a minute, this is all your fault!
(KIM AND MARI START ENGAGING JOSHUA AND CHASE HIM OUT OF THE HOUSE)
(MARI IS JUST ABOUT TO THROW THE UNDERGARMENTS THAT SHE FOUND AT JOSHUA BUT KIM STOPS HER)
KIM: I’m going to need those back… (SHE POINTS AT HER UNDERWEAR THAT MARI IS HOLDING)
(MARI GIVES KIM HER UNDERGARMENT)
KIM: Thanks…good work by the way
MARI: Yeah…you too.
